Goooooooood lawd.

These past few weeks have been cah-razy. Boyfriend recently moved into my basement. He was talking about moving out for awhile, and we brought it up to my mom and she just said "Well, you're here half the time anyway. You can put all your stuff in the spare bedroom." His rent is doing random things around the house that Mom won't/can't do. So far, he's changed the lights out front (something Mom just never got around to) and fixed the fence in the backyard that blew down during the blizzard last month (Mom says she can't do 'back-breaking labor', yet pushes herself all the time. Anyway, it was best Boyfriend did it).

Today I started my second semester of my freshman year of college. At the moment, I'm sitting in my bff's bedroom with her and Ethan. Samantha and I are doing our homework (well okay, I'm obviously distracted) and I'm already frustrated with one of my classes. I don't want to be an entrepreneur, so why bother taking the class?

Secret? The only reason I haven't hit the drop button is because Sam over here keeps looking over my shoulder and lecturing me about it.

Other than that, though, I'm loving my other classes. I'm taking geography, which I've always had a passion for. I'm also taking the required English Comp 1, which involves a lot of writing. Along with those, I'm taking Intro To Early Childhood Education and Child Psychology. I've pretty much settled on my career plan. I want this.

I'm going to be a doctor.

There. I said it. I'm going to be a god-diggity-damned doctor. But if someone has a heart attack, you should still call 911. No, I'm going to be a psychiatrist.

Okay well Friendly's beckons for my hardworking, studying, dilligent butt.

(Sam saw me write that and wants to argue: "Stephanie, I didn't even see you do anything.")
She just caught me on Facebook a few times. I swear that I was working. After only one day of class, how much is there to be done? Really now.

After a long talk with my mother,

I feel much better about myself than I have all day.

After a long, slow, boring shift at work, the last thing I wanted to deal with was more drama. I wanted to go home, shower, and order a pizza. No such luck.

I sat around after work watching my pets play in almost total silence. Finally, realizing there was nothing he could do, Boyfriend turned on the TV. We watched hours and hours of stupid TV until my mom got home and I could finally talk to her.

I love my mom. I truly do. She, unlike most parents I know, remembers what it was like to be nineteen, in love, and having issues. She doesn't take crap from anyone. We talked a lot about the issues I was having. They are far from resolved, but it certainly helped. I showed her the text messages I received from someone today, and vented all of my frustrations.

But then we got to talking about other things. My ever-changing relationship with my dad. My family. My uncle David. My cousins. Her boyfriend. Manners. How she raised my sister and I. My family's opinions of my sister and I. Everything.

I really do love my mama. She's done a great job as a single mother. I think I'll give her the fifty percent off spa treatment thing I won today. And pay for the other fifty percent. :)

I swear to God, I thought high school was over.

I was in the car today with my bff Sam, and we were discussing the latest text message I had received from my boyfriend. It contained the latest bit of drama involving certain people who have recently made it their life's mission to drive Boyfriend and I away from each other/make me miserable/cause all around tension.

Lyke, srsly? Wtf.

I'll spare you the nitty gritty details of this ongoing tension, but let me just say this:
I'm over it. No one's opinion should matter to me except my own, my sister's, my parent's, and my boyfriend's. Lucky for me, I have a handful of friends who like me for me. I can honestly say I have a few good friends in this world, and that's more than a lot of people can. They can think I'm a lying, good-for-nothing, trashy witch-with-a-B, but that's THEIR problem. I think know I'm not any of those things, and the people who truly matter to me know that too.

This doesn't just go for these few who have been clouding my brain recently, either. This also goes for the one who holds grudges from middle school, the one who still posts nasty things online from high school, and the bitter ex who still won't get over the break-up. Your words can't hurt me.

I'll leave you with this. My middle school English teacher put quotes up on the board every day, and this was the only one I ever remembered. I don't know who the author is (Google seems to be in disagreement) but it's a great quote to live by.

Be who you are and say what you feel.
Because those who mind, don't matter.
And those who matter don't mind.

I just have to remember to live by it.

Happy 2010!

What a decade.

When this decade started, I was nine years old at my sister's godmother's house. We had played with noisemakers, sang All Star by Smash Mouth into the microphone, and I cried when the ball dropped, half out of fear for the end of the world (remember the Y2K virus?) and half out of the realization that an entire millennium was gone.

When this decade ended, just last night, I was nineteen years old (celebrated my birthday on Wednesday!). I was sitting in front of my mother's laptop with my sister, my boyfriend, and my best friend. I didn't cry; I cheered and sent out a mass text to my friends, wishing them a happy new year.

A recap, from years 2000-2009?
-I traveled the furthest away from my family. I went to Ecuador in 2005 with my middle school on a trip to research the rain forest and to bring medical and school supplies to the indigenous children of the rain forest.
-I made and lost two best friends; first Caroline, then Katie. I realized I couldn't limit myself to one bff; I'm just not that kind of girl. And especially not when they expect me to ONLY hang out with them. Nuh-uh.
-I started and finished high school, and I started college. I started my 'life', I suppose. I figured out what I want out of it. And here it is: I want to be a psychologist. Taaa-daaaa!

Those, I think, are the major ones. But hey! I think I'm ready for a fresh start.