New blogventure, naturally.

I don't know how many of my followers out there in Blogland are still interested in hearing what I have to say, but if you are, my bff and I have started a blog together, appropriately called ";)", if you're interested in following!

Link:
Ohh3ybigcity ;)

Basically:
Katie and I are making the transition from small town to big city. She's in a super intense semester working towards her bachelor's in nursing (her final degree), and I'm working towards a bachelor's in psychology (which is only the first of three degrees I need to achieve my goal). We go to neighboring colleges in Boston and are experiencing the big, bad city.

You should read!

I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack!

After a month+ of taking a break at Blogger, I've begun a new blog over at Livejournal. My heart has always been with LJ, if I'm being honest, so that's where my daily updates are at now.

I have decided, after thinking long and hard, that I would keep this blog open and post occaisonally. I originally began a blog to keep in touch with and follow Seashell and Kathy (Boyfriend's sister and mom) over at Two Hands Full of Daisies and I don't want to let that go!

So, a few updates from my month.

1. I've been picking up extra hours at work. This means two things: A barren checking account, since somehow I'm justifying spending so much on clothes, but a swollen savings account. I've only made withdrawals from it to help out my Mom when she needs a little extra $$ and she always pays me back within a week. I don't know what I'm going to use this money for, but who cares? Just having it makes me feel good.

2. I WAS ACCEPTED AT EMMANUEL.

3. I also got my financial aid award from them today (private schools are pricey, yaknow?) and it covers almost all of my tuition, but no room and board. Poo. But both parents have offered to help out in little ways, like my dad offered to buy my books (didn't specify for how long, but let's pretend he means indefinitely...) and I'm hoping he cosigns a loan for me, and my mom has repeatedly said "We'll make this work."

4. I've gotten back in touch with my exbff, Katie. Katie and I went our seperate ways when I began dating Boyfriend. She's at college now, right across the street from Emmanuel, so I got in touch with her just in case we were ever to meet up again like waiting for the T or something. When she comes home, possibly next weekend, we're going to meet and have lunch to talk things out. Seriously, we were the type of best friends that would have been best friends foreeeever, had we not had a stupid fight.

Okay I'm leaving now! I've been distracted!

Dear Blogospshere,

I am taking a hiatus.

I don't know for how long, and I'm barely even sure why.

I'll get back to you on that. :)

Spring?!

Flip flop weather has crept up on me, and my hair is long and fabulous.

I bought two dresses off of eBay, and they are amazing. They have succeeded in getting me more pumped for springtime. Now if only there were flowers blooming outside!

My hair has gotten longer than I've had it in... I don't know how long. Since middle school(I was able to braid it for the first time since then, too!) I'm really excited to figure out all sorts of new styles.

At the moment it's back, because I was at the gym, but I'm about to blow my entire Forever 21 gift card I have left over for Christmas on accessories. Here I go!

I have a plan.

I'm going to devote myself to my diet.

No, I kid. But I am going to go back on a diet and get back my rockin' bod that I had for prom last year. I went on a strict diet (for me, anyway) and it worked out quite nicely.

The premise of the diet was to basically stop eating when I'm bored. I also ate healthier, asking for healthy options at resturants (one particuarly memorable moment was when I was at Friendly's with Sam, and I asked for applesauce with my grilled cheese. The waitress was confused, but I got my applesauce!), and worked out the best I could.

So today is Day One. I've stated a food log using an app on my iTouch that let's me keep track of calorie intake. And measurements today are 29", 37", 20.5" (waist, hips, thighs).

Actually, I just reviewed my email I sent almost a year ago, stating my size, and the measurements I gave them (lied about) are only about one inch smaller than I am now. That makes me feel good about myself, since I basically lied and said I was, like, five inches smaller all around.

Wooohooo bikini body here I come!

PS: My car is in the shop until at least Monday. So, as much as I'd love to go out shopping for granola bars and the like, it's not going to happen for a little bit. Sugar honey iced tea.

Are we growing up, or just going down?

Prepare for a worried rant. I feel like I need to get all of this stuff out of me and onto something else. Internet works nicely.

I got a postcard from Emmanuel yesterday and it asked for my course descriptions from Cape Cod Community College. I want to take this as a good sign, but I don't know?! I'm really nervous about everything right now. I'm nervous about not getting in and I'm nervous about getting in. Hello?! Didn't this same exact panic keep me home last year? Isn't this why I basically put my life on pause to attend a college I didn't want to go to?

I can't ever let the fear of the unknown keep me back happen again.

I'm nervous about leaving Boyfriend and Best Friends behind. Lately we've been talking about this. Ethan is planning on joining the Marines in July. He wants to come visit me when he gets out of boot. Ben wants to come up at least once every other week. Sam hates city life. Hopefully my other friend also named Sam moves up to Boston, too. She wants to go to UMASS. She talked about possibly getting an apartment together, which would be sweet, but I want the dorm experience at least once.

And I know that I have Adam and Cooper and I've met some of their friends who all seem nice. It's just strange. I've grown up with the same people since kindergarten. A lot of them still go to CCCC. I literally ran into my old friend Sean the other day and he looked at me like I never existed. Although I don't remember him getting to be so tall.

I love my BFF, too, but I'm worried a lot about her. She has this boy in her life that I feel like is just stringing her along. They dated at the end of last year but broke up two weeks later cause he was grounded all the time and had to sneak out to see her. She would give anything to be with him again. And I'm afraid it's cutting into her life.

I want a Wii really badly right now. I like going to the gym and I've been eating better but I like to SEE my progress, which Wii Fit lets you do. My sister wants me to get one so we can box.

Feelings. :(

Summertime, and the living's easy.

I cannot wait for the summer.

Don't get me wrong; I'm excited about the snow piling up right now outside my window. But hello! It's March. The first day of spring is right around the corner, and I can't wait until spring turns to summer.

I pulled my favorite tank top out of my closet today to try on, and as I did, Stephanie's 2009 Summer Anthem came on. Starstukk by 3OH!3.



This song, though kind of raunchy and not exactly great, reminds me of cruising down North Street with Samantha towards the parking lot behind the cafe to stroll down Main Street until the sun sets, then going to get ice cream and later, heading to Tiki Port.

Ah summer. How I can't wait for your arrival.

I like: getting my homework done on time.

I don't like: the feeling of not having my homework done yet and knowing it's fully my fault for being distracted by the internet.

I want you to know: that I'm spreading myself very thin and it's getting to be a lot.

I've planned: to give myself the life I've always dreamed of, even though it's going to take a lot of work.

I want to say to someone special: Boyfriend, thank you.

An award!

Thank you to Kathy and Seashell over at Two Hands Full of Daisies for this wonderful award!



Rules:
List 10 things that make you happy. (try to do one of those things TODAY!)
Tag 10 bloggers that brighten your day.
Make sure to link back to the person that tagged you!

Things that make me happy?:

1. Crossing things off my To-Do List. Ahhh, accomplishments!
2. My boyfriend and when he pretends to yell at me about how cute snow leopards are. And how my friends at work describe him as "the shit". And how he's perfectly content to sit with me snug under his arm while I read and he watches TV.
3. My little sister.
4. My parents.
5. Working with Mike and Sam and never running out of things to talk about.
6. Making breakfast for dinner complete with omlettes, toast, Panettone french toast and bacon.
7. CSI: New York and how it puts me right to sleep. zzzzzzzzzzz
8. Surfing the web.
9. Being anywhere near the ocean!
10. My animals and all their craziness.


And I want to tag you all!

I started to play a game!

I found this little dohickey over on a blog I stumbled upon, so here it is! The rules are that you post on the first Sunday of every month (or that weekend) the post only needs to contain the answers to these questions. Ready and here it goes, for February!

I like: the feeling I get when I wake up from a nap and my boyfriend is still snoozing next to me. Ahhh, comfort.

I don't like: foods that make me feel weighed down.

I want you to know: that I'm actually excited to go to work the next two nights.

I've planned: to do nothing for the rest of the night.

I want to say to someone special: Bff, even though you won't tell me what's on your mind, I love you a lot and I'm willing to hurt anyone who makes you sad.

Hey American Idol Fans! (And even those of you who don't watch)

Everyone knows that late winter means American Idol. Some people are passionate fans while others couldn't care less. I usually fall into the latter category, but not this season. This season, a girl I went to high school with is competing.

Siobhan Magnus graduated from my high school with the class of 2008 (one year before me, but she graduated with Boyfriend!). It's so crazy that someone I've seen with my own eyes walking through the halls of my high school made it to the Top 24. Now, we all need to vote for her so she can be our next American Idol!

Need more convincing? Fine. Fast forward to about two minutes and thirty seconds into this YouTube video and see for yourself.

Happy Valentine's Day!

I made the menus for the Valentine's day specials at work, and how was a repaid? A nine hour shift with my coworkers who also have significant others and were just as miserable to be there. Oh well. I suppose misery does need company, and we actually ended up having a good time.

Boyfriend got me gummy bears, Reese's cups, and a fake rose so it would last forever ("Just like my love!"). I got him concert tickets to see Dropkick Murphy's in March up in Boston.

I think my friends and I are planning an Irish Pilgrimage on Saint Patty's Day for the parades and the parties up in Southie. We wanted to go last year, but we kind of thought of it at the very last minute.

In regards to my last post.

I (for sure) didn't mean that I want to get married/have babies anytime soon. Oh my J, no.

The plan is ten years for babies (which has been ten years for two years already), at-least-age-23 for marriage. But while we're on the subject, let's talk dreams here!

My dream wedding. Aaaaah.

It would take place on the beach. On everyone's chairs there would be a shell, with a request in the program for our guests to toss the shell in the ocean and make a wish for our future at the end of the ceremony.

If I were to marry Boyfriend, we would have a mix of Jewish traditions, mainly to honor his family as he's not so into religion, and other religions traditions, since I'm not-so-Christian-as-much-as-spiritual.

For our processional song I've always loved "Beyond The Sea" by Bobby Darin or Robbie Williams. I really like the sound of Bobby Darin's voice, but I can't find a really good version at the moment.



Anyway, the Jewish processional would be like this: officiant, groom and parents, grandparents, groomsmen, bridesmaids, flower girl/ring bearer, bride and parents.

And after our first kiss as a married couple, the music would swell up and suddenly: The Beach Boys!



And then, bam! The party begins!

???

So I was super bored and doing a little Facebook creeping. I stumbled upon a friend's profile and I was shocked to find out she got married.

Excuse me?!

When did this happen? And honey, when did you move to Kentucky? I JUST SAW YOU IN THE MALL BEFORE CHRISTMAS. You looked just like the Scenie Baby I used to know, love, and actually kind of envy! I didn't even know you had gotten over all your old boy problems we used to spend hours dishing about during our long shifts at work. WHAT.

After getting over this shock, I continued creeping. I know, it's a bad habit, but it is certainly a time waster. I came across one of my childhood friend's profile and discovered that she's pregnant.

WHAT?!

Third trimester! Seriously! It's a girl! I even creeped a step further (oh internet you have made stalking so easy) and searched for her registry on BabiesRUs.com. Uuuugh. She just graduated with me in June. I felt a serious areyouserious when I discovered this.

I don't know, fellow bloggers out there in cyberspace. I'm nineteen years old, and just barely. Married Girl is twenty-one. Pregnant One turned nineteen a few days before me. My cousin is also pregnant, and she just turned twenty. My parents started dating when my mom was nineteen.

It's intimidating, you know. Thinking about starting my life. I don't make enough money to support myself right now. I have a really, really long road ahead of me as far as schooling goes. Ten to twelve more years. I'm going to be almost thirty when I complete everything I want to get done. Almost thirty. Or, God forbid, past thirty. I can't imagine being thirty and still in school. But it'll be worth it. Right? Right?

I feel a real, legitimate pressure to get my life on track. Seeing these girls with their lives getting underway kind of makes me jealous. I want to get off of Cape Cod and into the city where I can begin.

I don't know, guys. I just don't know about this whole life thing. Seems a bit intimidating.

Stephanie Takes Boston, Part One: Samantha, Too!

Last Saturday, my bff Samantha and I hit Boston. We left the Cape around 2:45, after a phone call from Adam. We headed on the highway blasting Lady GaGa and 3OH!3 and discussing psychology.

We arrived in Braintree and hopped on the T, taking us to Park Street, where we transferred to the Green Line, which took us to the Fenway stop. Adam met us there and we all walked to his school, my future school, Emmanuel College.



He gave Sam the tour, most of which I had already seen, and then showed us the dining hall. He pointed out all the food options and I said hello to Boyfriend's friend, Cooper (who gave me a hug and promptly went to get nachos). Then Adam said "Well, here's the food. You guys find something to eat and text me when you're done, I have to go help Katie with something." And he was gone.

I felt like a freshman on the first day of high school in that big cafeteria. Not that I got the same stares I did back then.

We ate our sandwiches and Adam came to get us, congratulating me on surviving through an awkward situation (maybe I'm a little dramatic?). He walked us to the gate and hugged us goodbye, since he was feeling a little under the weather due to excess caffeine and lack of sleep.

So, Sam and I were back on the T on our way to shopping heaven, or as it's known to maps, Newbury Street. Our first stop was a little store called So Good Jewelry.



And it was, truly, so good. She bought two bracelets and I bought a bracelet and a necklace. Each thing was only $6.99! And beautiful!

Then, we headed to CondomWorld, mainly to see what all the fuss was about. Not a huge deal, really. Then we went to Newbury Comics, and she wanted to check out Ed Hardy, so we went there next. I wanted to see what the big deal was with American Apparel, so we looked in there. Hot pink mesh leggings? No thank you.

Finally, on our last stop on Newbury Street, we went to Urban Outfitters. I immediately sent a text to Boyfriend: "I have died and gone to shopping heaven."



Samantha bought a set of test-tube shooters, and I went a little more crazy. I bought a glass with HOT MESS written on the side, a book called 'Do This, Not That', a book called 'Tell Me How' that has five hundred things in it that everyone should know, from how to change a diaper to how to catch a wave. I also bought a bottle opener that looks like a key, a notebook, a journal, a 'sweet nothings' notepad, and an 'All Out Of...' notepad for the fridge where you check off what you're out of, and voila!, you have a grocery list.

I love Boston. Maybe a little too much.

Goooooooood lawd.

These past few weeks have been cah-razy. Boyfriend recently moved into my basement. He was talking about moving out for awhile, and we brought it up to my mom and she just said "Well, you're here half the time anyway. You can put all your stuff in the spare bedroom." His rent is doing random things around the house that Mom won't/can't do. So far, he's changed the lights out front (something Mom just never got around to) and fixed the fence in the backyard that blew down during the blizzard last month (Mom says she can't do 'back-breaking labor', yet pushes herself all the time. Anyway, it was best Boyfriend did it).

Today I started my second semester of my freshman year of college. At the moment, I'm sitting in my bff's bedroom with her and Ethan. Samantha and I are doing our homework (well okay, I'm obviously distracted) and I'm already frustrated with one of my classes. I don't want to be an entrepreneur, so why bother taking the class?

Secret? The only reason I haven't hit the drop button is because Sam over here keeps looking over my shoulder and lecturing me about it.

Other than that, though, I'm loving my other classes. I'm taking geography, which I've always had a passion for. I'm also taking the required English Comp 1, which involves a lot of writing. Along with those, I'm taking Intro To Early Childhood Education and Child Psychology. I've pretty much settled on my career plan. I want this.

I'm going to be a doctor.

There. I said it. I'm going to be a god-diggity-damned doctor. But if someone has a heart attack, you should still call 911. No, I'm going to be a psychiatrist.

Okay well Friendly's beckons for my hardworking, studying, dilligent butt.

(Sam saw me write that and wants to argue: "Stephanie, I didn't even see you do anything.")
She just caught me on Facebook a few times. I swear that I was working. After only one day of class, how much is there to be done? Really now.

After a long talk with my mother,

I feel much better about myself than I have all day.

After a long, slow, boring shift at work, the last thing I wanted to deal with was more drama. I wanted to go home, shower, and order a pizza. No such luck.

I sat around after work watching my pets play in almost total silence. Finally, realizing there was nothing he could do, Boyfriend turned on the TV. We watched hours and hours of stupid TV until my mom got home and I could finally talk to her.

I love my mom. I truly do. She, unlike most parents I know, remembers what it was like to be nineteen, in love, and having issues. She doesn't take crap from anyone. We talked a lot about the issues I was having. They are far from resolved, but it certainly helped. I showed her the text messages I received from someone today, and vented all of my frustrations.

But then we got to talking about other things. My ever-changing relationship with my dad. My family. My uncle David. My cousins. Her boyfriend. Manners. How she raised my sister and I. My family's opinions of my sister and I. Everything.

I really do love my mama. She's done a great job as a single mother. I think I'll give her the fifty percent off spa treatment thing I won today. And pay for the other fifty percent. :)

I swear to God, I thought high school was over.

I was in the car today with my bff Sam, and we were discussing the latest text message I had received from my boyfriend. It contained the latest bit of drama involving certain people who have recently made it their life's mission to drive Boyfriend and I away from each other/make me miserable/cause all around tension.

Lyke, srsly? Wtf.

I'll spare you the nitty gritty details of this ongoing tension, but let me just say this:
I'm over it. No one's opinion should matter to me except my own, my sister's, my parent's, and my boyfriend's. Lucky for me, I have a handful of friends who like me for me. I can honestly say I have a few good friends in this world, and that's more than a lot of people can. They can think I'm a lying, good-for-nothing, trashy witch-with-a-B, but that's THEIR problem. I think know I'm not any of those things, and the people who truly matter to me know that too.

This doesn't just go for these few who have been clouding my brain recently, either. This also goes for the one who holds grudges from middle school, the one who still posts nasty things online from high school, and the bitter ex who still won't get over the break-up. Your words can't hurt me.

I'll leave you with this. My middle school English teacher put quotes up on the board every day, and this was the only one I ever remembered. I don't know who the author is (Google seems to be in disagreement) but it's a great quote to live by.

Be who you are and say what you feel.
Because those who mind, don't matter.
And those who matter don't mind.

I just have to remember to live by it.

Happy 2010!

What a decade.

When this decade started, I was nine years old at my sister's godmother's house. We had played with noisemakers, sang All Star by Smash Mouth into the microphone, and I cried when the ball dropped, half out of fear for the end of the world (remember the Y2K virus?) and half out of the realization that an entire millennium was gone.

When this decade ended, just last night, I was nineteen years old (celebrated my birthday on Wednesday!). I was sitting in front of my mother's laptop with my sister, my boyfriend, and my best friend. I didn't cry; I cheered and sent out a mass text to my friends, wishing them a happy new year.

A recap, from years 2000-2009?
-I traveled the furthest away from my family. I went to Ecuador in 2005 with my middle school on a trip to research the rain forest and to bring medical and school supplies to the indigenous children of the rain forest.
-I made and lost two best friends; first Caroline, then Katie. I realized I couldn't limit myself to one bff; I'm just not that kind of girl. And especially not when they expect me to ONLY hang out with them. Nuh-uh.
-I started and finished high school, and I started college. I started my 'life', I suppose. I figured out what I want out of it. And here it is: I want to be a psychologist. Taaa-daaaa!

Those, I think, are the major ones. But hey! I think I'm ready for a fresh start.